Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep.
— Psalms 121:4
God Is Always There
Sometimes things get so heavy, it feels as though we are totally abandoned, even by God. It has been called “the dark night of the soul” & very appropriately so.
I recently had one of those experiences. I was in Houston & had just finished doing a memorial service for one of my close friends who had died of AIDS. I visited his twin brother, who was also dying of AIDS. I stayed with him & cared for him. Finally, I had to leave to go to the airport. I was so sad.
I boarded the plane & it took off. For a long while we were flying in the clouds-dark & gloomy, just like my mood. Then, the higher we got, the clouds began to thin. Finally, we got high enough that the sun shone brightly in a sky of blue! “Why,” thought I, “the sun was always shining! It just looked dark because the clouds were covering it up. But the sun never slumbers nor sleeps — just like God.” A peace came over me & with it came an inner knowing that God was in charge of all that was happening, & everything would work out for the highest good.
When we got to Austin, we had to descend through the dark clouds once again & land in the rain. But this time I wasn’t depressed, because I knew deep within my soul that high, high above the clouds the sun was shining!
Today I understand that no matter how dark my life’s events get, the light of God is always shining in my soul! I go within until I feel that light burning through the darkness, just as a candle can light up an entire room. I truly embody this knowing, & I am comforted.
Rev. Dr. Rainbow Johnson
ADAAP Clergy Counselor